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Grateful
The last couple of weeks the choir at church has been singing Grateful by Hezekiah Walker (listen below) and whenever they sing the spirit moves. There is not a day that goes by that I am not Grateful for my relationship with CHRIST! This song reminds me of how much HE loves me. In this season I am in learning to trust HIM with all the issues of my heart and I am so glad that HE shows me who I am and then restores me. MY GOD MY GOD MY GOD!
Psalm 136:26 Give thanks to the GOD of heaven, for HIS steadfast love endures forever.
Romans 5:2-5 Through HIM we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in hope of the glory of GOD. More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because GOD’s love has been poured into our hearts through the HOLY SPIRIT who has been given to us.
Blessings
A'Keta Julinate'
Single Single...Life
I have gone back and forth trying to decide if I would write this post. I was not sure if I wanted to be so candid about my life but I am reminded that GOD blesses and delivers you to bless and deliver someone else. So......
September 4, 2004 I stood in front of my family, friends and GOD and married a man who I thought was the love of my life. Today 8 years later I am divorced and single. When I got married at 27 I NEVER thought that I would be single at 35.
When I decided that I wanted to start dating again it was hard. I can remember telling my brother that this whole dating scene was not what I wanted. I had dated my ex husband for about 3 yrs before we got engaged so it was difficult for me to step back in the dating scene. I can be honest and say that when I decided to start dating again I wasn't seeking GOD for the man HE had for me. I was still growing in CHRIST...AMEN! So needless to say that my relationships were short lived and usually sexual.
In April 2011 I finally made the decision to stop talking to a guy that I really liked because he was not willing to make a commitment so I decided to take a break from dating and focus on my relationship with GOD. I was tired of giving so much of myself (physically and mentally) to others. I knew that if I seeked GOD HE would pour into my spirit.
After about 9 months of not dating and spending time with GOD I met someone who I thought was good for me. I can remember GOD telling me one night as I was sitting on the end of my bed that HE was going to send me someone that truly loves me. HE reminded me of my relationships with my girlfriends. He said you feel love from them...right? I sent them to you....Surely I will send you a husband that will love you. I smiled and thought well GOD you sent me someone already....
Little did I know then that GOD was telling me that guy was not the one. I talk about my disobedience of that relationship in a previous blog.
Today...right now as I am writing this I am enjoying being single. Last week I was emotional and really feeling the blues that I am 35 single with no biological kids of my own. I wanted to write this post to say I struggle with being single and really giving up control of the relationship area of my life. Wheeew.....saying that out loud is freeing! WOW
I TRUST GOD with every area of my life EXCEPT the relationship area. I have given GOD every area of my life EXCEPT the relationship area. I don’t stress over anything EXCEPT the relationship area. I go to GOD about every area of my life EXCEPT the relationship area. I need a moment after writing that....
This makes me sad! I am telling GOD that HE is not good enough to handle my relationships. It is like me looking HIM in the face and telling HIM that I don’t trust HIM enough to get it right. Like I can do it better....
That is clearly not true! Hello that is why I am divorced and single because I had my hands in the mix ALL this time. I need to let go (exhaling) and KNOW that HE is GOD!
My declaration to GOD: I throw up my hands and surrender to YOU GOD! I am giving YOU EVERY area of my life to include the relationship area. Like YOU said YOU did great in sending me the BEST girlfriends (LOVE YOU LADIES) YOU will do the same when it is time to send me a husband.
Until then I will continue to allow YOU to mold me and shape me into YOUR masterpiece. I will stay out of my own way and TRUST YOU GOD!
During this transition I will not concern my time with dating or finding a husband but with pleasing YOU As Paul discussed in 1 Corinthians 7:34 a woman who is no longer married or has never been married can be devoted to the LORD and holy in body and in spirit (Read 1 Corinthians 7:25-40 in depth).
When I feel myself getting emotional I will draw closer to GOD and remember that my JOY comes from HIM!
Again I pray that my words blessed someone as it always blesses me to be real with my feelings and GOD!
Blessings
A'keta Julinate'
Life's Journey
Last Tuesday my Brigade Commander decided he wanted to run a 5k in honor of the Coast Guard's Birthday. He sent out an invitation for everyone to join him. I thought it was a good idea since he was new to the unit to be inviting to others but I was dead set against running. On Friday the day of the run the Commander came in and he was so excited about the run but I still stuck to my word that I was not running. By late afternoon I had changed my mind and was excited to sign up for the race so I could get a t-shirt and show support to the unit.
The run started at 7pm and it was at least 105 degrees and dusty outside. The wind was blowing and it felt like a hot blow dryer (yea....a blow dryer). Once I got to the race I got excited and started looking for familiar faces amongst the masses. I wanted someone that was going to run and walk the race with me. Well when the race started I found myself alone (Some people ran ahead of me and I ran ahead of some people). I was full of energy and in good spirits when the race started off but soon the heat started to beat me down. It was at that time that GOD began to reveal to me that in the natural I was running/walking a race but in the spirit HE revealed that this was life's journey. HE began to show me that the heat, the dust, the wind, and the incline were obstacles in my life. HE said you are going to go through some things…your run/walk with me is not going to be easy there are going to be somethings that will come against you but I AM THE LORD THY GOD! When I got to the 2nd mile I was too done and over this 5k (LOL) but then I saw a table that had cold water bottles and as I grabbed one GOD said "just when you want to give up think of that water bottle as my word. The word is there to sustain you as you continue on." During the run there were individuals who encouraged other runners/walkers along the way either through words of encouragement or by running behind their battle buddies to keep them moving and motivated. GOD reminded that HE places people in our lives to do the same thing to push us, to encourage us, to cheers us on. MY GOD MY GOD MY GOD! As I got to the 3rd mile I was really hating life and wishing I could just go to my car and call it quits. That is when GOD really began speaking into my spirit. HE became the ultimate encourager. HE gave me the extra energy to continue on. I pushed past the pain, the heat, and the exhaustion and kept going. As I hit the track to run the last lap the Commander was there to push me harder and finish the race strong.
HE WANTS US TO FINISH STRONG!
Disobedience
Around this time last year I was in such a good place with GOD. I had made a decision to have an intimate relationship with GOD and allowed HIM to pour into my spirit. I gave HIM my time and HE became a priority in my life.
Fast-forward to February this year. I met a gentlemen that I felt was a good match for me. I explained to him that GOD was number ONE in my life and that I spent time with HIM first. He said he understood that GOD was the head of my life and for the first few weeks I continued to spend time with GOD first and then hang out with the guy I was dating second. As time went on I felt like I was stretching myself then. After working all day I didn’t have time for much else so....I only spent time with GOD in the mornings and my nightly run with GOD went out the door.
A few times during my morning worship with GOD I could tell I was not focused and that my heart and mind was not completely there. Those times were mostly when my personal relationship was not right. Throughout the relationship GOD would show me that I was disobedient by sending me to a scripture that would convict me but I still tried to make everything work out for my good.
Last month I realized that the relationship was not healthy and that I need to get back on track with GOD. I went back to the states and just spent time at home. It was perfect......
I was in a place for GOD to really tell me about myself and more importantly for me to listen. I came back to Kuwait a mess. I called my sisters and friends and told them until I was completely broken I could not talk to them or spend any time on social networks. The first night I got back from vacation GOD woke me up out of my sleep to tell me that I put man before HIM. When I looked back I realized that I had...it BROKE my heart that I did that to my FATHER. I immediately repented and cried out to HIM
The next couple of days felt so strange. It was like I was a little kid who had disappointed their parent. I wanted to be under GOD but I was so ashamed (like Adam and Eve) that I was hiding from HIM. One morning I was standing in front of the mirror and GOD said I have forgiven you and no longer remember your sins you need to do the same so you can move on. I talked to one of my girlfriends later that morning and she also said I needed to forgive myself and even led me in prayer to let go of the guilt. I needed to move on.....
I desire more than anything to have an intimate relationship with GOD...HE IS FIRST over all things! I am thankful to HIM for RESTORATION, GRACE and MERCY!
I would like to thank my mom who fasted and prayed for me during this time....YOU ROCK WOMAN OF GOD!
Blessings
A'keta Julinate'
GOD's Love
Sunday past was Father's Day and while I was in church GOD reminded me of a time in my life that I yearned for the love of my biological father. I was in my early 20s and had met my biological father a few times only for him to deny my brother and I on all occasions. Growing up I felt rejected by him and it affected my life. I can remember crying over him and wishing he loved my brother and I like he loved his others kids. IT HURT! As I got older and started dating the rejection affected my relationships. I didn't feel pretty enough or adequate enough because if my own father didn't love me then how can anyone else.
When I was about 25 GOD delivered me! Hallejuah I was at church one Sunday and I can remember being in pain (emotionally) and crying out to GOD. GOD met me there at the alter. HE wrapped me in HIS arms and said "CRY no more over this man. I have sent you two dads that love you unconditionally and NOT only that I am your DADDY. I am here for you ALWAYS!"
At that moment I was delivered from the spirit of rejection and my biological father's actions no longer affected me. GOD was right I had two DADS who loved me..mistakes and all! LOL Most importantly MY GOD LOVED ME!
Two years later when I got married I was okay when my biological father declined my invitation to my wedding. My wonderful Fathers Otis and James and my twin brother Antonius (who as always acted like my daddy...lol) walked me down the aisle.
Today I still pray for my biological father that GOD will deliver him and I wish him well.
Thank you GOD for reminding me of where you brought me from! Thank you for your unconditional LOVE! Thank you for taking care of every situation in my life! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH DADDY!
Crying Out to GOD
Whew GOD is so AWESOME! The more and more I study HIS word and cry out to HIM the more HE reveals HIMSELF to me. Whatever issue I am going through HE sends me a word to deal with that very issue. HE wants to work everything out for HIS good and it is up to me to listen and follow HIS word. I am so thankful for the relationship I have with HIM. I pray that our relationship continues to grow and that I will go from GLORY to GLORY!
2 Timothy 3:16-17 All Scripture is inspired by GOD and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right. GOD uses it to prepare and equip HIS people to do every good work.
James 1:22 But don’t just listen to God’s word. You must do what it says. Otherwise, you are only fooling yourselves.
Blessings!
A'Keta Julinate'
Your Best Life Now
Good Sunday BlessedOnes!
Earlier this week my mother asked for all of my siblings and I to read
"Your Best Life Now 90 Devotions for Living at Your Full Potential" by Joel Osteen. Earlier this year I read "Your Best Life Now: 7 Steps to Living at Your Full Potential" and it was such a blessing to me so I was excited to read this devotion and even more excited to read it with my family!
Join us in reading this devotion for the next 90 days! It is my prayer that it will be a blessing to you!
Hebrew 11:1 Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see.
Blessings
A'Keta Julinate'
My Prayer
This morning during prayer I asked GOD to allow me to be a better person today than I was yesterday. It is always my desire to BE INVITING to others so I can share the goodness of GOD though conversation, a smile, a hug or other gestures. Working on a Military base I come in contact with different types of people daily and if my spirit/attitude is not right how I am going to represent GOD! Psalms 51:10 says create in me a clean heart, O GOD. Renew a loyal spirit within me. In order for me to have a clean heart I have to tell my flesh to die daily! When I accepted the LORD JESUS CHRIST as my personal savior I became a NEW CREATURE in CHRIST (2 Corinthians5:17) and my old self was crucified with JESUS (Romans 6:6). Because of my willingness to please GOD I believe HE will renew my spirit daily and I am going to declare a fresh anointing over my life.
I am willing today to have a clean heart! What about you?
I encourage you to study GOD's word. I am learning so much while I am blogging and it is helping me be a better person and more so a better CHRISTIAN (GLORY)!
Blessings
A'Keta Julinate'
Resurrection Sunday
Matthew 28: 6 HE isn’t here! HE is risen from the dead, just as HE said would happen. Come, see where HIS body was lying.
Today is the last day of Passion Week(Holy Week) and it has been declared that JESUS lives! As I look back over this week and how excited I was for weeks about Resurrection Sunday I realized that being passionate about JESUS is so awesome and feels so right that I want to be passionate about HIM daily not because HE does something for me. That Friday when HE died on the cross for me 2000yrs ago HE did enough (Hallelujah)!
Today I rejoice in knowing that JESUS loves me! AMEN
Blessings
A'Keta Julinate'
I Won't Complain
Today my family and I are celebrating my Grandmother's birthday (Happy Birthday Ma)! My Grandmother was a very special person that always showed love to everyone she met. Whenever I am down and missing her I listen to the song "I Won't Complain". My Grandmother requested a family friend to sing this song at her funeral and it described her life so well. During her last days she was sick and in pain but she never complained about her life and ALWAYS gave GOD the Glory!
I believe that my Ma left us with such a valuable lesson. Even though I may go through some storms and my life is not going how I would like it to go "I won't complain"! ~Thank you Ma....I LOVE you so much!
Blessings
A'Keta Julinate'
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