It has been about two weeks since my uncle has gone home to be with the LORD and although I miss him I am so happy that he is no longer in pain or having to take dialysis every day (can you believe that he was on dialysis for 18 years.....GOD is so good).
A few weeks before my uncle went into the hospital he was on my mind heavy and I now know that GOD was preparing me for my upcoming assignment. So when the call came that Joel (my uncle) was in the hospital I knew that I was suppose to go visit him and pray for him. The first time I prayed for him the Holy Spirit told me to tell Joel that GOD was waiting for him to make his request known and to cry out to HIM! When I told Joel he started crying and with each visit I could tell that a shift was taking place in my uncle.....he was talking to GOD more and more and asking GOD to wrap HIS loving arms around him. Weeks to follow Joel and I were able to share some alone time together and I used that time to talk to HIM about how good GOD had been to him and to make sure that he had repented for his sins.
On Thursday morning, July 21st when I got the call at 3am that my uncle was leaving us I jumped up and got on the road and during the hour drive to the hospital I tried to prepare myself to be strong for my aunt (who was like his mother) but nothing could have compared me for what I saw when I walked into the ICU room. I had just let my uncle the night before around 10 and I left thinking that he was going to be okay but I was starting to see that GOD had other plans. Joel was now hooked up to a bunch of machines and had mittens on his hands because he was so restless and trying to pull his tubes out. Although he couldn't talk very well because he was on 100% oxygen he was still able to tell me he loved me. The more and more I watched him it looked like he was fighting someone....he was swinging his arms and even tried to get out the bed a few times. In the spirit realm it seemed to me like he was fighting the death Angels because he wasn't ready to die. After watching him fight for awhile I asked if myself and my aunt could pray for him and he agreed.....we prayed for peace and for GOD's will to be done in his life. I wish I could really explain the peace that came over the room after we prayed.......slowly my uncle stopped fighting, the transition began and several hours later at 6:53pm Joel Pittman took his last breath.
Now I had never seen anyone pass before but I am so thankful that GOD allowed me to encounter the love HE had for my uncle. As I watched Joel's pulse go down to zero and touched his chest to confirm he stopped breathing I started rejoicing.....to be honest I started singing! Lol....I know sounds crazy but my spirit just wanted to praise GOD for answering our prayers so I started singing Thank you LORD! Now of course there were a few tears but there were a lot of smiles also as we started to remember the good things about Joel.
I wanted to tell this story to bless someone else but I also wanted to go back to that day and hold on the love I felt that day. I told my cousin about a week ago that I wish I could bottle up the peacefulness and the love I felt that day.....I want to always remember that GOD....not that HE is any different any other day....so I guess I want to always be in a good place to receive the peacefulness and love of GOD.
LOl....there were even a few times over the last month that I thanked GOD that I wasn't married and didn't have kids because I was able to sit at the hosiptial and not have to split my time between my family........another reminder that GOD has a plan!
At Joel's home going service I read Phil 4:4-9:
Always be full of joy in the Lord. I say it again—rejoice! Let everyone see that you are considerate in all you do. Remember, the Lord is coming soon. Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. Keep putting into practice all you learned and received from me—everything you heard from me and saw me doing. Then the God of peace will be with you.
Thanks for going on this journey with me!
All last week I kept checking the weather all excited about the the warm weather we were going to finally get here in the Carolinas. Saturday came and the weather was okay but there wasn't much sun and it was windy. I thought okay well Sunday is guaranteed to be a good day! Well Sunday as I was on my way to church it started to rain and I just laughed and I said okay I get it.
What did I get you ask?! I constant reminder that things in life will not always go as planned. LOL...I am sure I am not the only one that wishes it would. For the past 6 years I worked for the military and working for Brigade Commanders and General Officers I became proficient in planning out their days down to the minute so to return back to the states without a plan but to trust GOD has been HARD!
There are days I beg GOD for the full plan for my life because I don't like not having a plan or having a plan and it not working out. Again, working for the military if something changed in the schedule I always had a plan for the plan and I was quick on my feet. Now when a door closes it forces me to sit still and ask GOD to order my next steps.
As I am writing this tears are forming in my eyes because I feel like I am not truly trusting GOD. My pastor said on Sunday that faith is believing GOD is going to answer your prayers or open doors on your behalf but trust comes in when those things don't happen you are still okay because you still trust that HE has a plan. Honest moment....because this is the only way I can grow.....I have faith but I don't always have trust even though I have seen how GOD has worked things out for my good! I want to trust HIM in season and out of season...when things are working in my favor and when things aren't.
I am thankful that GOD continues to show me my weak areas so that I can continue to grow. I ask that you pray for me in this season as I push closer to HIM and I will do the same for you.
Psalm 9:10 And those who know Your name [who have experienced Your precious mercy] will put their confident trust in You, For You, O Lord, have not abandoned those who seek You.